How can I work with someone who has my problem?

Question

     How can a hypnotherapist work with someone who has the same problem they have? I’m quite overweight and have been unable to conquer the problem.  When someone calls me to help them manage their weight I tell them I don’t handle that.  I feel they won’t have any faith in me when they see that I have the same problem they have. But others keep pressing me to accept such clients.  What’s your feeling about this?

 

Answer

         My weight control clients see a happy, overweight, and over 78-year-old woman who has confidence in herself, loves her work, and has miracles who walk out of her office weekly. They don't seem to mind at all that I'm not perfect-looking.  In fact, they seem to have more confidence in me because they know I've struggled with some of the things they struggle with, and have had a great journey along the way.  They know I understand depression, because I've been there.  They know I understand weight issues, because I've been there.  But I also don't have to have "been there' to understand a lot of other problems. I had a great childhood and have never experienced physical or sexual abuse, yet I have great results with my many clients who have had to go through those horrors.

             I make use of those experiences in talking with my clients, just as I make use of humor regarding my weight.  In a humorous way, I tell them that I can name my layers - where they came from and what they protect me from.  It doesn't discourage them - it encourages them. Frequently, it reveals to them their own underlying reasons. 

            There are some obese therapists I won't go to, not because they are overweight, but because they are sloppy in their appearance, and they look like they hate themselves and their bodies. I have confidence in people who look like they care for themselves and like themselves.   

            My first hypnosis instructor had to take breaks to sneak a cigarette, but it didn’t stop her from teaching us students a great deal about great methods for helping people kick the habit, and have some compassion and understanding about its difficulty for our clients. 

            It's all in how you use this stuff, folks, not in trying to be a perfect, ideal specimen in order to be an effective therapist.